This is Woody Allen's film through and through. He wrote it and directed it, and it shows.
Vicky (Rebecca Hall) and Cristina (Scarlett Johansson) are best friends who decide to spend the summer in Barcelona at the home of expats Judy and Mark. The decide to take in the sights, and end up at an art gallery where artist Juan Antonio (Javier Bardem) is showing some of his paintings. Cristina is intrigued, but Vicky is cool to the artist. At dinner, they meet Juan again, and he invites them both to Oviedo, and small town in Spain, telling them that he's attracted to both of them.. Vicky is quite dismissive, and even repulsed by Juan, but Cristina, ever game for a new love affair, agrees to fly with Juan to his father's home. Juan eventually becomes involved with the two Americans. His crazy ex-wife Maria Elena (Penelope Cruz) re-enters Antonio's life, and complications ensue.
Part of the problem I had with the film is that the dialog was so blatantly Allen's, that it was off-putting. He didn't write to the characters, but as if he was one or more of the characters. His tortured mindset is in full display here, but it's as if the last 30 years never happened. It's an old-fashioned film, and I don't mean that in a complimentary sense.
Another thing: what's Allen trying to say here? What I took away from the film is that (1) American women are loose, (2) they're suckers for an accent, (3) most American men are dull, boring, and parochial. Marriage to dull men may be safe, Allen says, but it's unfulfilling, and leads to life-long regrets. Not an original message, nor compelling in any sense.
Rated PG-13 for mild sexual themes. language
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